Let’s be honest. Work can bring out parts of us we don’t always love.
The sharp email.
The tense meeting.
The moment you feel your face get hot and your patience leave the building.
The instant when one more request, one more change, one more “quick question” feels like the thing that might finally push you over the edge.
And in those moments, it can feel like your brain has gone offline.
You’re not thinking clearly.
You’re reacting.
You’re defending.
You’re spiraling.
You’re trying not to say the thing you’ll regret later.
In other words… you’re trying not to lose your ish at work.
My special guest today is Hiba Tanvir and she’s simplifying how to not crash out at work.
We tackle and simplify all aspects of it, including:
- What emotional dysregulation can look like at work, and why it doesn’t always show up as a big dramatic blow-up.
- The early signs we might notice in ourselves or others before we reach that breaking point.
- What to do in the moment to regulate your nervous system before you react.
- When someone does crash out at work, what belongs to the manager, what belongs to the individual, and how both can respond with more care and accountability.
- What it means to “lend your calm and your cortex” when someone else is dysregulated.
- How her “Play & Pause” methodology can help us create just enough space to choose a better response.
- And in her chapter on emotional intelligence in the AI era, Hiba connects emotionally intelligent leadership to hope. So we talk about how leaders can use:
- Self awareness - being aware of your needs, strengths and weaknesses
- Self management - what do I need in order to regulate?
- Social awareness - empathy and compassion for others, and reading the room - “empathy in action”
- Relationship-building - working together with others
…to help people feel steadier, safer, and more hopeful at work. And why that is something AI simply cannot replace.
Q: Are you wanting to not crash out at work? If yes, this one is for you.
It’s time to #DoTheThing!
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<What’s catching my eye this week>
- 3 hours of (free) focus music for deep concentration - Quiet Quest - Study Music
- Mary’s book is out now! Buy Squash the Sunday Scaries: A Modern Playbook to Rebuild Trust, Transform Culture, and Reignite Your Workforce on Amazon now or your favorite bookstore!
- Hire Mary Baird, PHR to help you run a 30-day Employee Experience Accelerator to listen better to your workforce, rebuild trust in your senior leadership and improve culture at work - The Simplifiers
- 50 powerful questions to help you reflect - The Institute of You
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My challenge for you this week:
How are you going to take what you’ve learned in today’s episode and take action to not crash out at work? What’s one thing you’ll do differently? Share it with me, privately or publicly. Snap a photo of you doing the thing, and send me a DM over on LinkedIn (https://www.linkedin.com/in/thesimplifiers) for added accountability and support!
Links, books and apps mentioned:
Resource: Find Hiba Tanvir on LinkedIn - click here
Book: Career Breakthrough Playbook: Get Unstuck, Get Ahead: Master the Six Essential Skills that Drive Professional Growth and Success - Will Lukang, Hiba Tanvir, Donya Smida, Joël Vuadens-Chang, Neha Deshpande, Eric. E. Ebron
Book: Strong Ground: The Lessons of Daring Leadership, the Tenacity of Paradox, and the Wisdom of the Human Spirit - Brené Brown
Resource: Get 20% off a 45-minute Play & Pause session (in person or virtual) by using the promo code: SIMPLE - Hiba Tanvir
Watch: Hiba Tanvir featured on NBC5 - TX Today
Podcast: How to practice empathy without burning out, featuring Joseph Cope - The Simplifiers Podcast
Podcast: How to squash the Sunday Scaries (guided visualization) - The Simplifiers Podcast
Mary’s New Book is Out NOW on Amazon!
My new book, Squash the Sunday Scaries: A Modern Playbook to Rebuild Trust, Transform Culture, and Reignite Your Workforce, is out now — and you can buy it today on Amazon, Barnes & Noble or your favorite independent bookstore.It’s written for HR leaders, people managers, and anyone ready to make work better in a practical, human way. If you’ve been looking for simple tools to improve employee experience, rebuild trust, and create better results for your people and your business, this book is for you. Learn more, visit: https://squashthesundayscaries.com
About Hiba Tanvir:
Hiba Tanvir - As the creator of the highly distinctive Play & Pause™ Methodology, Hiba Tanvir brings Emotional Intelligence out of theory and into lived, embodied practice. With an MBA and advanced resilience education from Harvard University and the Gottman Institute, she helps leaders PLAY intentionally, PAUSE purposefully, and perform at their best—without emotional depletion, disconnection, or reactivity. She is also the co-author of The Career Breakthrough Playbook, focusing on EQ mastery for rising professionals.
Where Hiba hangs out online:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hibatanvir
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ht_compassion
Website: https://www.htcompassion.com
Hiba’s vote for the perfect guest on The Simplifiers Podcast:
LaKeisha Reid - She is a dynamic speaker, workshop facilitator, strategic consultant, and creative leader who helps business leaders get unstuck and live in purpose. She is based in Dallas, Texas, and brings her work to audiences through speaking, consulting, and facilitation. She is known for helping leaders create greater clarity, momentum, and purpose in their work.
